Supercluster

A lot to catch up, especially about baby. With all my excitement for this pregnancy, I am also busy and tired most of the time so managing my time to spend for this blog became one of those "mission-impossible" things. Okay, lets make this short and sweet shall we? 20 Nov 2012 I had a scan with Dr. Widad and found that the baby grows active and happy, she is 12w5d. I had a bit of bleeding, I was thinking because Dr. Widad did the internal scan. I was quite worried but she said nothing to be worried about. 8 Dec 2012 Routine check up (2nd check up) with Dr. Wafaa and review the scan result, she confirmed that every thing is perfect. no weight gain. That is most important for me. No Weight Gain!! Weight: 89,2Kg 15w Mission: Maintain the weight, and taking the supplement diligently.

Talking about dream home, we thought it was impossible if we were still working abroad. But it turned out to  be a dream come true. With the limited financial we knew we will not be able to buy our dream house, although it would be sufficient for the down-payment but not for paying the whole thing. Buying a house is no cheap, when we see the price of the house, we would forget there are some hidden price we need to pay, such as -the most consuming one- taxes, yup!! And at the beginning we have no clue it  would cost us so much more than we have budgeted. Let me share you little bit the process of getting a house in Indonesia - if you are planning to get a housing mortgage. 1. Get in touch with the sales person, let him tell you more about the house you are going to buy, since you are abroad, you may need to ask as many questions as possible in order to understand more about the property and the vicinity you are going to live in. 2. Be friend with the sales person, he may...

I sometimes feel really desperate that I don't have time for myself anymore, I am losing that one cell in my brain that gives me the words to be written. It upsets me in fact that I have nothing to say, as if my mind freezes in such a way that I don't even know what to think, what to write, and I know for a fact that if I continue this that tiny little cell I am talking about would eventually vanish and I could not get it back. To write has become a therapy for me, my own way to meditate, to stay calm and controlled. By not doing this, I feel like zombie, like seriously dead man walking. I created a twitter accounts, incognito, even 140 characters I was not able to create a sentence.  Just a little update about my pregnancy:  Nausea, none. Weight gain, going there, but controllable, although new maternity skirt for work is needed. Weight: 87kg Sunday appointment with dr. Wafaa, Medcare

It has been 8 months since my last miscarriage, now I am expecting my third one. Although I am still scared from what happened, but I guess I am more ready now. I will face everything ahead of me, I will not back down. My baby now is so good to me, I dont really feel sick - only when I brush my teeth I feel sick in my stomach, but other than that I am perfectly okay. Let see what happen, I just hope he will be alright.. LMP: 24 Aug 2012 Due Date: 31 May 2013 (based on LMP) DueDate: 9 June 2013 (based on USG) Weight: 87Kg Pregnancy Mission: Eat Healthy Food, to maintain weight and gain max of 10Kg (another impossible mission!)

Sudah berbulan-bulan proses pengajuan KPR kami, sudah dari Bank A sampai Z, masih saja belum goal. Kami tau kendala kami adalah karena kami berdua kerja di luar negri.  Setelah begitu banyak penolakan, sudah hampir 3 bulan ini proses pengajuan KPR kami di Bank BII di proses, pelayan yang sangat memuaskan dari pihak bank dengan follow up nya yang sangat profesional, mengetahui kami tinggal di luar negri pihak bank tidak berkeberatan melakukan komunikasi melalui email bahkan apabila ada sesuatu yang penting tak segan mereka menelpon sambungan internasional. Beberapa hari yang lalu, kami terima sms "pak, sudah acc", aku dan suami yang sudah menanti kabar ini sejak lama merasa sangat gembira sekali. surat persetujuan dikirim melalui email dengan dilampirkan syarat dan ketentuan KPR, yang hampir seluruh persyaratannya bisa kami penuhi, kecuali satu: payroll suami harus di setor ke BII!! Mau marah.. This is the whole point why we got rejected by the other banks, karena gaji k...

Minggu, 26 Februari 2012 Pagi itu tepat jam 8 aku beranjak meninggalkan rumah. Cuaca mendung dengan hembusan keras angin dari padang pasir, menyeburkan beribu butir pasir ke wajahku. Aku berbisik sudahlah angin, cukup aku saja yang marah hari ini. Hari masih pagi, sinar matahari yang biasa menyinari diam bersembunyi di balik awan hitam, langit menjadi buram. Sekali lagi aku berbisik kamu juga awan, sudahlah hentikan murammu, cukup aku saja yang bersedih.  Mobil yang membawa kami berhenti di perempatan menanti lampu berubah hijau, angin semakin keras berputar-putar, pasir menari-nari di atas aspal - rupanya kamu sedang bersenang-senang di sana wahai pasir, aku tersenyum getir. Lama terasa menanti lampu tanda berubah hijau, mengapa aku tidak sabar menuju sebuah kehilangan besar. Setiba di tempat tujuan, jantung ku berdetak lebih kencang, anginpun bertambah marah, berdentam menghantam dinding kaca. Aku menoleh kebelakang, satu pembatas jalan terbang terpental. Mengapa semua haru...

Sayang.. Sudah berapa lama kita bersama? Sepuluh minggu, Delapan minggu atau mungkin Enam minggu saja. Cukup sesingkat itu aku merasa jatuh cinta, bahkan sangat cinta. Akupun tidak menyangka sedikit saja waktu yang ku butuhkan untuk bisa menyerahkan hatiku untukmu. Sayang... Sesingkat itupun kamu harus pergi dariku, tidak kah kamu ingin selalu bersama denganku? Aku terlanjur sayang kamu, walau mereka bilang kamu belum sempat ada. Lalu apa ini yang berdenyut di dalam ku, apa ini rasa ngilu di perutku, apa ini pening di kepala ku. Tidak cukupkah tanda bahwa kamu memang ada, bertumbuh di sana bersama detak jantungku. Hari ini aku harus bangun, menerima fakta bahwa kamu memang sudah tidak ada. Walau terus teringat bagaimana aku kehilangan kamu yang sudah berdetak jantungnya di dalam hatiku, teringat percakapan terakhirku denganmu yang belum bernama. Singkat keberadaanmu, tapi selamanya kamu di hatiku. Cinta dan sayang, Bunda

On Friday morning, we went for a breakfast outside. I felt a little bit of cramp in my lower abdomen and my lower back. I didnt think of something serious will happen, as we continue to walk until mid day. When we reach home I found dark blood, I felt something wrong will happen, and worried the rest of the day. Saturday was my appointment with Dr. Wafaa, I told her my concern about the bleeding. She did the scan but the pregnancy stay at 6 weeks. So she did another scan which confirmed that the pregnancy is not growing, even the size of the gestational sack was not round anymore, it was like an empty sack. I continued to bleed even more when I reached home, and found the sack out from my thingy.. Ya Allah, this is it.. I lost the baby. On Sunday I was admitted to the surgery unit and had an evacuation surgery, but I pretty much had everything out. My hubby was there the whole day with me. Eventually all my questions answered, the baby is not for me to keep although on...

The same like my first pregnancy, this one has got another discrepancy too. Based on my LMP am supposed to be 8 weeks pregnant, but my ultrasound scan showed my that I am just 6 weeks pregnant, what most concerning me is that we could not hear the heartbeat yet, the doctor said it is just too early to hear the heartbeat, so we have to wait for another two weeks. I asked the doctor about my "morning sickness absence", she said it might not be a good thing, because the more active the pregnancy the sicker I get. Now that I dont feel anything, I am also a bit concern. Strange that I did not take any blood test on my first check up, isn't that necessary to check about my pregnancy thoroughly? I dont know, maybe I should just wait until next 2 weeks. Lots of thing that I am concern about: aside from no morning sickness aka not active pregnancy, also about my weight.. I am seriously overweight!! Doctor made a point on that one, and said no chance of dieting while I am pre...

My first appointment is set for Saturday afternoon with Dr. Wafaa in Medcare. I am hoping that she is pro-natural birthing as I am quite a traditional person when it comes to the motherhood issue. I probably will ask more about that before I move ahead with her. My preferences are so simple and yet so traditional, just 2 main things actually: Natural Birth and Breastfeeding Initiation right after delivery. I am also concern about my weight and am starting to take a small meal every now and then instead of three big meals a day. I lost 1kg though, yes not much but I think if I keep doing this and control my carb intake I will not gain so much weight later on, better yet to lose weight in the end of pregnancy, which hardly possible. Now I am not really should how far I am this week, so I am really looking forward to visiting Dr. Wafaa. I wish everything is alright. Little info: Weight: 85kg I lost another 1kg, with a slight feeling of full tummy. I need to buy a maternity pants,...

Yesterday hubby won the Semi final of Anchor Challenge , hopefully he wins the final like last year. I was so happy to hear the news and so proud that he actually won the semifinal over the Executive Chef of Shangri-la Dubai. He really into this competition thing, he will go again on April 2012 for FHA2012 Culinary Competition in Singapore, May in South Korea for the final of Global Chef Challenge, if I am not mistaken Australia on September for MLA Black Box Challenge. I can just pray for him, and wish for the best for my dear husband. Although I am going to be so sad when he is away. Good luck chef, my pray for you.. I love you..

Maybe I am one of the lucky women who doesn't feel any pregnancy symptoms which mostly are the sickness. I am just so lucky, the only thing I feel is I am so tired or easy to get tired. I am thinking, maybe I should go to see the doctor soon, maybe next week. Little info: Weight: 86kg I lost 1kg from last week, but still obese.. weeww!!

Last Thursday I got myself a pregnancy test pack, it was POSITIVE! I was shocked, and so anxious as I dont really expect this to happen now. Strange that this one is so different than the first one, I dont feel I am pregnant. Well, I am glad that I dont feel morning sickness, I just doubt.. Am I really pregnant?? Can the test pack be wrong?? I know I can just go to see the Obgyn, I just dont feel like. If it is counted from my LMP I am now on my 7 weeks, so I thinks it is still too early to go to see the doctor, maybe in a few week. Maybe it is just a wishful thinking of not being pregnant, maybe I am not really ready to have another child. Little info: Weight: 87kg super obese!! i know :(

It was a big and nasty fight last night, although we did not have any guts to tell it on our face, we used bbm!! I have never said anything rude to him, but writing it on bbm helped me a lot in releasing all the dirt out of my system. I felt better afterward. I dont know how can I hate him so much and love him at the same time. I am feeling alright now, I dont want to fight anymore, but I still dont want to say sorry, I just want him to hug me..

Aku cinta kamu karena اللّهِ , bukan karena untuk status di Facebook, bukan karena uang kamu karena uang Ada habisnya, bukan karena rupa mu karena rupa ada masanya..  Karena untuk skali ini aku coba taati perintahNya, untuk sekali ini aku coba tepati janjiku dihadapanNya..  Ini ibadahku, yang kuyakini mendapat ridhoNya.. Tanpa cinta ini untukmu, aku bukan lg siapa-siapa di mataNya..